{"id":154,"date":"2022-04-25T09:01:27","date_gmt":"2022-04-25T09:01:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/?p=154"},"modified":"2022-04-25T23:02:20","modified_gmt":"2022-04-25T23:02:20","slug":"that-one-time-i-was-an-elf-in-lord-of-the-rings","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/index.php\/2022\/04\/25\/that-one-time-i-was-an-elf-in-lord-of-the-rings\/","title":{"rendered":"That one time I was an elf in Lord of the Rings"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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I’d like to be an elf! Or rather …aren’t vampires elves? So I’m already there \ud83e\udddb\u200d\u2642\ufe0f\ud83e\udddb\u200d\u2640\ufe0f <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The way I see it, vampires are urban elves, completely assimilated to human culture (or at least the successful ones are). Fairies are country elves, with that immigrant stubborness that doesn’t let even a drop of human culture in. And elfs proper …. elves proper are snooty jerks! Haha!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I feel in my nature, I’m a fairy living as a vampire for a while….but with all this extreme weather I’m starting to go dwarf! Dwarves, of course, are elves in tune with electricity and machinery. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I’m thinking…I want to invest in an solar panel generator after I can buy my next booster shot (a million curses on the negligence of “my” government, truly). With electricity being erratic lately because of extreme heat + humidity + wind, the feelings created by the Great Texan Winter 2021 Power Outage have come forth…not fun. Every flickering light, every weird little noise…thank God it’s not like the power has gone out completely in the sense we’ve lost food, but it’s not…pleasant. Considering how much delicate bullshit goes into the needs of modern life, it really feels like a miracle we have things like AC at all. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

It’s a miracle, but it also allows us to ignore the world around us. Not that I’m advocating to do away with all of it completely….I enjoy living in a state of physical and mental homeostasis, it must be said. Yes! Everyday I revel in the undeniable pleasure of the modern elf’s basic needs! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Anyway, here’s my Basic Utilities Power Ranking: <\/p>\n\n\n\n

1) Fridge & freezer — if you have food you have life!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2) AC — can’t live in 90’s -100’s weather without it! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

3) Phone\/ Wi- Fi — it’s not fun to be disconnected when it’s not a choice…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4) Light — love to see things at night time!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

5) Oven & Stove — there is nothing more nourishing than food made by your own hand…nothing! <\/p>\n\n\n\n

There you have it! Till next time! \u26a1\ufe0f\u26a1\ufe0f \u26a1\ufe0f<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’d like to be an elf! Or rather …aren’t vampires elves? So I’m already there \ud83e\udddb\u200d\u2642\ufe0f\ud83e\udddb\u200d\u2640\ufe0f The way I see it, vampires are urban elves, completely assimilated to human culture (or at least the successful ones are). Fairies are country elves, with that immigrant stubborness that doesn’t let even a drop of human culture in.… Continue reading That one time I was an elf in Lord of the Rings<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-154","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-selfie","entry"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/154","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=154"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/154\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":158,"href":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/154\/revisions\/158"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=154"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=154"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dorybot.online\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=154"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}